Everything is the fault of Humans.

Everything that’s happening in on the earth that is perceived as negative can be linked to Global Warming, and thus, linked to us. This is the height of Religion: Anything that agrees with our cause will be well circulated, while anything that does not agree with our cause will be buried, hidden, or discredited by any means necessary. Once you are able to accept our dogma without question, everything the Church preaches starts to make more sense… even if the event has nothing to do with C02, driving an SUV, cutting down trees, or the flag that we planted on the moon. Even if whatever happens has nothing to do with any of those things, if we (the Church) can link it to Global Warming, we can make an even stronger case against Man. So what if the Earth’s climate has fluctuated more without Man then with? So what if we have been in Ice Ages with higher C02 then in our current levels? You must have faith… We know what’s best for all of mankind.

We will start by using a cause such as the constant fluctuation of weather to strengthen our cause. Next, we must silence the oppositional view by any means necessary. We will power this war of information with donations from the public, who will willingly give money to this righteous cause. Finally, we will use this power to influence entire countries, which would be foolish to stand against us, as they will be seen as standing against the entire planet, thus every person on it. Our followers are great in numbers, as anyone who “just wants to help” can be easily controlled with a minimum amount of media attention.

The Church of Global Warming has you. Pay no attention to the facts; they don’t matter when it comes to this Religion.